There is no “legal alternative to meth”

I just checked out the blog stats again, and saw that people still find their way here whilst searching for a “legal alternative to meth”.

Let me make this absolutely clear: THERE IS NO LEGAL ALTERNATIVE TO METH!

I’ve written about it several times, and I’m too lazy to link to the past articles now. I mentioned a legal substance called “provigil”, and that’s about as close as you will ever get. However, I’m assuming I really have to spell it out this time, since we addicts are so damn stupid. When I wrote about provigil, I described my journey into the search for legal meth substitutes in the hope of saving others the trouble – I was being a little helpful – but also more than a little ironic, and extremely sarcastic.

If you are addicted to meth, you are addicted to “tweaking”, which is best described as a state of mind that is achieved along with a meth high. A high is a “feeling of euphoria”. That is, you feel good, nothing more. * Legal substances (aside from anti-depressants, which is not what you want anyway), don’t even give you that. Tweaking comes with the meth high, and it involves being overly fascinated with whatever you happen to be interested in, and literally tweaking on it for hours on end.

The bottom line is this: If ever you find yourself searching the internet for a “legal alternative to meth”, you are in deep trouble, and probably have been for some time. You are addicted to one of the worst substances that you could ever possibly be addicted to, and to make matters worse, you do not understand your own addiction. You do not understand what it is doing to you, or how it makes you behave.

If you want to have any chance of stopping this from destroying you, your best bet is rehab. And not just any rehab will do – neither a rehab that’s just out to make money, nor one run by religious zealots who teach you that you are paying for your sins. I must emphasize that this is only my opinion, but to me, understanding is key. First, understand the nature of your addiction, then you have some chance of beating it. But any further efforts to find a legal substitute will never lead anywhere.

I took that road and I’m writing this in the hopes that you don’t repeat my mistake. So don’t be like me… What I have written here is a truth that is better to be believed than to be lived.

* Update: What it means to be high (The above is advice for addicts – below is advice for people who are not addicts)

This is not directly related to the rest of the post, but may be useful for some… I’ve written a few times about a man who helped me with what he said when he was chair of the disciplinary hearing (which was as a result of my actions in my quest to intentionally be fired) at the horrible place where I worked last year.

I have found that there is a huge misunderstanding of what it means to be high. The man to whom I refer spoke a great deal of sense which helped me immeasurably, but despite his years of experience with addicts, he also spoke a great deal of nonsense. I will only write about the nonsense related to his misunderstanding of a meth high here…

At one stage, he asked something like “What if you rape some girl because you think she is your girlfriend?”. Um, but for one incident when I woke up (having gone to sleep next to her) and we were already busy, having started in my sleep, I have been celibate for three years. Neither I, nor anyone else, has ever raped anybody because we thought they were somebody else while we were high. Meth makes you feel good, and it makes you tweak. (Irrelevant to the points I am making here, but FYI, and despite what you read elsewhere, it does not directly lead to aggression. It does make you over-react emotionally to everything; thus aggression, depression, excitement, loneliness and all manner of emotive states are over-felt and over-reacted to.)

Nobody ever raped or murdered anybody because they were high. If you believe anybody has – you have been duped by an addict who committed a premeditated act (they probably planned it while they were not high), and used meth as a clever way to deny responsibility for their actions. That is, they took advantage of, and further perpetuated, the general misunderstanding of what a meth high involves.

About Jerome

I am a senior C# developer in Johannesburg, South Africa. I am also a recovering addict, who spent seven years using methamphetamine. I write on my recovery blog about my lessons learned and sometimes give advice to others who have made similar mistakes, often from my viewpoint as an atheist, and I also write some C# programming articles on my programming blog.
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